Wisdom from Proverbs for Marriage

Today we are going to increase in wisdom in the most important decision you will ever make in your life - after knowing Jesus.  The first most important decision you can make is the decision to follow Jesus; that is an eternal decision.  After that, the most important decision is not your career, your clothes, your shoes, your house, where you will live or what church you go to.  The decision that will impact you most after choosing to become a Christian is who you choose to marry!  This decision will impact your life like no other decision.  This is the one decision that can determine if you live in a war zone or in peace; in poverty or prosperity; in frustration or happiness; in chaos or order!

QUALITIES FOR A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE

What a MAN'S ATTITUDE should be toward marriage:

The man who finds a wife finds a treasure and receives favour from the Lord - Proverbs 18:22  A wife is a RARE TREASURE to be cared for and cultivated.  Most women respond to a loving attitude.  Choose to: WORK HARD AND WORK TOGETHER – she needs to know she’s your priority and you are on her side!

What a WOMAN'S ATTITUDE should be toward marriage:

A worthy wife is her husband's joy and crown; a shameful wife saps his strength - Proverbs 12:4  A husband is to be SUPPORTED and RESPECTED.  A wife's attitude is NOT to NURTURE or NEGLECT but to RESPECT.  Shameful means 'Disinterested and disrespectful'

Great Marriages don't just happen, they take work!

So we need to become SKILLED in HOW WE BUILD!

ATTITUDES THAT TEAR DOWN:

Main Ways a Woman Tears Down is With Her WORDS:

• Nagging – A nagging wife annoys like a constant dripping - Proverbs 19:13
• Arguing – It is better to live alone in the corner of an attic than with a contentious wife in a lovely home - Proverbs 21:9  Contentious means 'argumentative'
• Complaining – It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife - Proverbs 21:19  TO COMPLAIN WILL ONLY DRAIN YOUR MARRIAGE!

Main Ways a Man Tears Down is With His ACTIONS:

The Main thing Proverbs WARNS men to guard against is LOOKING & LONGING - Why be captivated, my son, with an immoral woman? - Proverbs 5:20  Captivated means 'thrilled or fascinated with'.  Men are VISUAL – they are VISUALLY under attack all the time.  A second glance makes an image an imagination.  Don't allow inappropriate images to turn into an inappropriate imagination.  Looking at images is cheating on your spouse!  You begin to compare your spouse with the images.  Nothing devalues a wife more than when her husband looks after another woman - Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. ….May you always be captivated by her love - Proverbs 5:18-19

ATTITUDES THAT BUILD UP:

1. HEALTHY INTIMACY

A wife needs to be VISUALLY GENEROUS toward her husband.  Honey seems tasteless to a person who is full, but even bitter food tastes sweet to the hungry - Proverbs 27:7

Give him an eyeful every day and he won't stray!

2. TRUST EXPLICITLY (Trust means 'to put one’s confidence in')

Her husband can trust her and she will greatly enrich his life - Proverbs 31:11  Trust takes years to gain, minutes to loose and when lost may never be gained again.  If trust is broken, understand that it will take time to earn that trust back.

3. WALK IN UNITY

She will not hinder, but help him all her life - Proverbs 31:12  Unity means 'to be pleasant and agreeable'.  Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction? - Amos 3:3  Couples need to AGREE IN UNITY!  They should talk and pray together.

4. LIVE GODLY

He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honour - Proverbs 21:21  Righteousness means 'to desire to live right'

More than anything else this will BUILD A STRONG MARRIAGE AND A GREAT LIFE!